From Grits to Chopsticks

Rhette McClam Cannon

Feb 15, 1923 to Apr 28, 2012

Susan’s mom passed away on Saturday morning.  We were so very thankful to have arrived in South Carolina last Tuesday, enabling us to spend her final days together.

Even in the face of death, we have a hope for the future based on the unshakable promise of God: “For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we shall be changed.” 1 Corinthians 15:52

See you later, Mom.

It’s time for another blog about funny English and unique things that we find around our city.  We understand that there are probably equally “interesting” translations from English to Chinese in America, so these comments are not intended to be critical – just fun.

We ate lunch with some of our students two weeks ago at a semi-western cafe downtown where they had this exciting menu item:

Although Susan didn’t intentionally select the “bacteria fried rice,” she must’ve gotten its close cousin based on her quick trip to the bathroom.  Speaking of restaurants and restrooms, we’ve yet to eat at the “modern toilet restaurant,” assuming that there might be a good reason for the added measure of convenience:

Since I’m on a roll with potty humor, the following full-size poster in a nearby shopping center may have chosen the wrong word:

There is a much broader variety of food flavors here in China.  We would not normally use the word “numb” to describe chips in the West:

Nor would kids flock to ice-cream trucks filled with pea-flavored cool-pops:

The owners of this store couldn’t decide if they wanted to spell its name correctly or phonetically:

We bought these felt-tip markers a few weeks ago for our students to use when coloring Easter Eggs.  We assume that this statement is an attempt at some form of warranty:

One of my all-time favorite signs (at almost every bus stop) features a cute baby:

At first glance, you might think that this is an advertisement for a daycare or a baby store.  But the baby’s position makes more sense when you realize that it is actually advertising the city’s proctology hospital.

One of the more popular brands of cleaning supplies tries to get you excited about being homely:

Here’s an interesting choice of words on a sign in the park which forbids climbing of trees:

Finally, here’s a misspelled sign that caught my attention while exiting a subway:

This sign is interesting due to its location – I shot this picture over the holidays in Washington, DC.  I just hope that it’s not near the Department of Education.

A week ago, we celebrated the hope and joy of Easter.  It’s interesting to think of what if must’ve been like to look into the empty tomb, realizing that the promised resurrection was true.

Two weeks ago, another tomb-related festival was held here in China – Qingming Jie: a time to sweep the ancestral graves and offer sacrifices.  We hiked up the nearby mountains yesterday, walking through areas full of tombs:

Unlike that special grave on Easter morning, these tombs are still sealed and occupied:

On Qingming day, relatives come to clean the area around the tomb, burn incense and paper money, and place offerings of food and fruit in front of the door.  Even after two weeks, there’s still quite a lot left:

Some of the trails up the mountain can get rather steep, especially on a mountain almost 7000 ft above sea level:

There is a temple on the mountaintop, enclosed by ancient gates (reported to be over 1000 years old):

This temple was bought a few years ago by an investor who hopes to improve its popularity for business purposes.  One of his “upgrades” has been to replace the old trail and steps with something more modern:

As you descend from the Buddhist temple, you encounter other shrines:

In a city of over 7 million people, there must be many who are seeking to know what really happens after the tomb is sealed:

A popular book among students is “Crazy English” by Richard Lederer.  We haven’t read the book, but sometimes our English Corners might seem kind of crazy.  Recently, after we talked about St. Patrick’s Day, the students ate green snacks:

Speaking of “snacks,” almost all students mispronounce the word to sound like “snakes,” an error that is apparently propagated throughout the national education system.

On the final week of each month, we set up western board games for our students to play.  A table host guides the English discussion around each game:

Last week, the lesson focused on the history and traditions of Easter, separating fact and fiction.  After the lesson, the kids colored eggs (most have never done this before):

They also participated in an Easter egg hunt, answered Easter questions, and enjoyed some Easter snacks.

Although one student knew something about “Easter Island,” very few have any genuine knowledge about Easter, so it’s great to be able to talk about this important holiday.

When we first came to China, we were a bit surprised to see bags and bins of large bullfrogs in many stores, including our local Wal-Mart:

So it was only a matter of time before they showed up on our table.  While eating with some new students this week, I wondered why they were laughing while ordering the food.  Shortly thereafter, the waiter brought this “frog log” to the table:

They graciously filled my bowl with the fresh frog soup:

Chinese cooks don’t remove the bones before chopping up meat.  So you just grab a chunk with your chopsticks, put it into your mouth, and spit out parts of frog anatomy that you probably haven’t seen since High School biology class:

Along with this meal, we had an unfamiliar green vegetable, “qing tai” (tones 1 and 2):

In case you don’t have your Chinese-English dictionary handy, “qing tai” is “moss,” which seems perfectly appropriate to have with frog soup.  Fortunately, we had a dish of pepper sauce to “adjust” the taste to our individual liking…

We often find it interesting to compare prices between what we pay here in China and what we remember from America.  Some things are more expensive, but we’ve found some foods quite a bit cheaper.  Our market has some pretty good prices on fruits and vegetables during the right season, like these strawberries and oranges, both at 72 cents per pound:

And these fresh brocolli heads at 40 cents for two:

We often eat with students at “home cooking” restaurants where we can get a decent meal for a good price, like two plates of gaifan and bowls of soup for three dollars total:

But not everything is cheap.  Some things will surprise you, like this fresh milk which we buy at our local store.  It is only sold in 1 liter cartons and spoils quickly:

When our kids were young, we used to buy 3 gallons of milk at a time.  If we did that here, it would cost us $18.00!  Also, some “modern” convenience items are pretty expensive, like these 12 cup coffee makers which sell for $125USD:

When it comes to “Western” food, we are grateful that some items are available in a few small local shops or in the “impurted” section of the large German owned chain called “Metro” (sadly, Wal-Mart’s imported section is too small to count):

One of the local shops, “Auntie’s,” is located about a half hour away.  All I can say is that Auntie must be a rich woman because everthing she sells is on the high side.

Here is an assortment of pricey goods that we picked up recently:

After our typical morning breakfast of oatmeal, we occasionally splurge and have a small bowl of “Frosted Mini Spooners,” the knock-off version of Frosted Mini Wheats.  Cereals are 2x to 3x the price you would normally pay in the States.  The next time you eat a bowl of “Blueberry Morning,” remember that the small box sells for almost $8 in China:

The price for beef steak is also very high since it must be imported from far away places (like Australia).  We bypassed the frozen ribeyes in the photo below ($24.50 per pound):

Pork prices have also skyrocketed in China (by as much as 65% in the past year), putting the squeeze on local consumers.  You might be able to get a decent deal if you wake up this butcher in a local market:

I don’t want to leave you with the impression that all meat in China is expensive.  But it takes some guts to eat the cheap stuff…

Almost every time we go shopping, we are reminded of numerous differences between China and America.  You might expect things at Walmart to be the same all over the world, but back in America, we don’t ever remember seeing an entire aisle of cooking oil:

Or soy sauce:

And of course, there are bins and bags of rice:

Many of the products also surprise us.  While there may be on occasional piece of gristle on your chicken kabob in America, you normally wouldn’t consider it a selling point:

And just in case you were wondering what happened to old donkeys:

We’re not sure how much spice it takes to make donkey meat edible, but we suspect it may take quite a bit.  With that in mind, it doesn’t really surprise us to see “strange taste” horsebeans (is that redundant?):

Even familiar brands offer some “interesting” flavors:

I have to admit, though we’ve lived in China for over two years, I still don’t think I’m ready to wake up to a bowl of crab oatmeal.

We’re now into our third week of classes here, and we have the opportunity to work with over a hundred new students (I took pictures of each one to learn their names):

 Along with the new group of students, Mark also has a new lunch schedule, giving him the opportunity to spend time with small groups of students and get to know them better.  They meet and eat at small restaurants in the village behind our school, often having rich conversations over a bowl of cheap food.

English Corners are also back into full swing.  In order to accommodate all of the students that would like to attend, we now meet on Thursday and Friday afternoons.  Even though it’s about a month late, this week we discussed Valentine’s day, relationships and the meaning of love:

On Sunday afternoons, we often enjoy quiet walks around our local zoo.  A week ago was our first time back in 2012, and we noticed that the entrance is decorated to celebrate the year of the dragon:

The zoo is actually a large park which also includes amusement rides, food vendors, and countless cherry trees which are now in full bloom:

It turns out, that during cherry blossom season, the zoo is NOT the best place for a quiet walk:

For a fee, you can climb up on a platform into the flowers and have your photo taken in traditional clothing.  Or you can get your compliant grandfather to do it:

You can also get your picture taken with a Chinese model:

Or you can save the money and take your own photo anywhere on the grounds:

After a long day of looking at flowers, it’s nice to lie down on a blanket with your (toy) assault rifle:

Or find a peaceful spot to play majiang with friends:

When you get hungry, there’s a lot of good food for everyone, including “fish sticks” for the baby:

or a drink of fresh coconut milk:

We played it safe (sort of) and just had a few sticks of barbeque:

And wherever you find flowers, there will be butterflies:

Yes, there’s nothing like a quiet day at the zoo (and this was nothing like it)!

A new business opened on the corner of our apartment block today.  In keeping with tradition, we heard the roar of a zillion firecrackers ignite just before lunchtime – the first step in the process to chase away evil spirits and attract new customers.  It is also traditional to surround the new business with floral sprays, usually delivered by scooter:

Snack shops and beauty parlors usually have 5 to 10 such flower arrangements on opening day, but this new “investment business” is obviously operating with a bigger budget.  There were probably 50 of these huge arrangements, as well as 30+ rose globes like this:

With over 3,000 roses and countless other flowers, these guys must have some of their investment money in local flower businesses:

This business also held a dragon dance to bring good luck:

And a military band, which we later heard playing “Yankee Doodle”:

We’re not sure if the big guy in this photo was the boss or just a major customer, but it was pretty obvious from his expensive cars and entourage that they considered him to be someone of importance:

But when it comes to importance, we preferred to watch this attendee enjoy the music: